Asthma and Gratitude

I have chronic and life long asthma. And it’s getting worse.

I can’t leave the house without my rescue inhaler, in case I get a wheezing fit, which are becoming more and more frequent. Any physical activity can trigger it — walking up a couple flights of steps, rushing to catch a train, anything beyond a slow walk. It’s starting to interrupt my sleep more and more, sometimes a couple times a night.

It got so bad that I had to go to the ER earlier this year. I woke up in the middle of the night with the worst asthma attack of my life. I felt like I was breathing through a straw, my chest hurt, I had painful coughing fits, and I could barely walk across the room. My normal meds didn’t seem to be doing anything. I feared that I would just pass out and no one would be there to help me.

I saw my allergist soon after that. He told me that there wasn’t really anything more they could do, beyond the medications I was already taking. Which wasn’t really the answer I was looking for. Just fix it!

With all of that, I am still grateful. I’m grateful that I have the privilege of having access to medications that can deal with the worst symptoms of this illness. And I can seek the aid of specialists when I need to. And that I don’t have to work in a field where I need to exert myself physically to earn a living.

So while this is a chronic and lifelong condition, it doesn’t stop me from living my life in the way that I wish. I know many others who are going through much much worse health challenges. So even in the midst of another wheezing fit, I count my blessings as I take another puff of my rescue inhaler.